Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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