We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
i came on her dog
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize
