okay pat passed out under dana's car
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
