I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
