My first STD was from a foam party
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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