But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
