Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
