Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
