I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Randomize