butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
