What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.