Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
