dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
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i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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