I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize