Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
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