Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
