So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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