Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
