Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
His nipple licking is glorious
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