fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
