just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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