So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
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dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
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You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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