I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize
