no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
