she looked like the before picture.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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