At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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