hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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