and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize