turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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