So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
