She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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