Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I will die if light touches me.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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