It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
We were destined to go to rehab together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize