If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
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