i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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