quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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