I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
