I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Randomize
