How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
