Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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