no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
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I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
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Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I yelled at your uterus for you.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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