Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
