If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
