I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
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