we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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