Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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