it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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