Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
