If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Randomize
