Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
