wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
